It’s a common theme, but that doesn’t make it any less true: Abject stupidity has no boundaries.
Oh, the Colonel’s shame
Kentucky Fried Chicken, the folks that one time brought its customers the “side breast” in a cluck bucket (which was half a breast and part of the back), now has a new gimmick – Bunless Double Down sandwiches.
Of course, their marketing gurus had to come up with a catchy, memorable campaign. These marketing geniuses are paying college students to wear fitted sweatpants with “Double Down” in large letters across the posterior.
You guessed it! All of the students are female and comely, as my grandmother used to refer to as girls who were “pretty as all get-out.”
If this New Age marketing ploy works, look for the Colonel to be handing out halter tops to promote the company’s “Big, Bigger, Biggest Breasts” promotion.
Politicos expound
All you can see and hear these days are the words of would be politicians wanting to stay in Congress or go to Congress claiming they are for change for change’s sake. Change is needed, they decry in everything from health care to the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq to the welfare system to immigration to Social Security.
All most people want is for a politician to run on a single plank of an important platform: Congress shall pass no law that does not apply to members of the federal government, and make retroactive any laws which subvert the intent of this law.
Period.
Now, go forth and find someone running for election who will 1) Promise to support such a law, and 2) introduce such a bill and push it vigorously.
Good luck on finding any takers.
And, finally …
The way it now stands, the GOPers will regain control of the House, and possibly the Senate.
That will not solve a single problem plaguing this nation.
The Grand Opulent Partiers will only perpetuate the divisive culture of the House and Senate as party politics become even more prevalent and more ingrained in the political arena.
The Demagogues have the most ineffective leadership of any party in recent history. Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid are empty suits who have the political social skills of warthogs.
The GOP leadership – Mitch McConnell and his cast of Incompetents – is no better.
Clean sweep and start over?
Anybody?
Everybody?
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Friday, September 10, 2010
And it is written: The nutcases will rise up and protest
You gotta love those Good Book-lovin’ church people.
You know, the fervent but wrong-headed dingdongs who believe in freedom of religious expression as long as it’s connected to their core beliefs.
The intolerance of certain philosophical tendrils connected to major religions is astonishing to those who believe it’s okay to believe what you want to believe, that the Golden Rule should be applied in every situation and that my personal freedom to follow the religion of my own choosing is a right that should be extended to everyone.
Then, there is stripped nut-screw or two that throw that belief all asunder.
A small Florida church, with a congregation of less than 50 members, led by the not-so-reverend Terry Jones caused a worldwide brouhaha when he announced a Quran (Koran) burning. (It’s a small church filled with feather-headed know-nothings, for gosh sakes!)
It was Jones’ intention to send a message to the godless Muslims that there is only one holy book and it didn’t start with the letter Q, er, or K.
Presidents of countries – including Barak Obama – appealed to the preacher not to burn Muslim holy book. Government and military officials (including Gen. David Petraeus) and the FBI requested the plan be cancelled, noting that it might put lives of U.S. soldiers in further jeopardy in Muslim countries.
Jones first said he would not hold his burn-the-book rally, but then hedged and said he might. He didn’t say God is telling him what to do, but it is plan the god-publicity might have a hand in his final decision.
As sure as chickens don’t have lips, other headline seekers came out of the woodwork. Pastor Bob Old of some smaller-than-a-teacup Tennessee church said he was going to burn the Quran. His reason: “They worship a false god. They have a false text, a false prophet and a false scripture.”
Tolerance, get thee behind Old Bob and those of his ilk.
And a spokesman for the good ol’ Westboro Baptist Church in Topeka, Kansas, said if other churches don’t burn the Quran, they sure as hell will.
The Westboro clan is known for protesting at funerals of American soldiers.
Oh, and they believe that God is punishing Americans for being tolerant of homosexuals.
One thing is for certain: The fanatical side of the Muslim faith has a lot of company in the hairball section of life … the fanatical side of fundamental Christianity in America.
You know, the fervent but wrong-headed dingdongs who believe in freedom of religious expression as long as it’s connected to their core beliefs.
The intolerance of certain philosophical tendrils connected to major religions is astonishing to those who believe it’s okay to believe what you want to believe, that the Golden Rule should be applied in every situation and that my personal freedom to follow the religion of my own choosing is a right that should be extended to everyone.
Then, there is stripped nut-screw or two that throw that belief all asunder.
A small Florida church, with a congregation of less than 50 members, led by the not-so-reverend Terry Jones caused a worldwide brouhaha when he announced a Quran (Koran) burning. (It’s a small church filled with feather-headed know-nothings, for gosh sakes!)
It was Jones’ intention to send a message to the godless Muslims that there is only one holy book and it didn’t start with the letter Q, er, or K.
Presidents of countries – including Barak Obama – appealed to the preacher not to burn Muslim holy book. Government and military officials (including Gen. David Petraeus) and the FBI requested the plan be cancelled, noting that it might put lives of U.S. soldiers in further jeopardy in Muslim countries.
Jones first said he would not hold his burn-the-book rally, but then hedged and said he might. He didn’t say God is telling him what to do, but it is plan the god-publicity might have a hand in his final decision.
As sure as chickens don’t have lips, other headline seekers came out of the woodwork. Pastor Bob Old of some smaller-than-a-teacup Tennessee church said he was going to burn the Quran. His reason: “They worship a false god. They have a false text, a false prophet and a false scripture.”
Tolerance, get thee behind Old Bob and those of his ilk.
And a spokesman for the good ol’ Westboro Baptist Church in Topeka, Kansas, said if other churches don’t burn the Quran, they sure as hell will.
The Westboro clan is known for protesting at funerals of American soldiers.
Oh, and they believe that God is punishing Americans for being tolerant of homosexuals.
One thing is for certain: The fanatical side of the Muslim faith has a lot of company in the hairball section of life … the fanatical side of fundamental Christianity in America.
Thursday, September 2, 2010
It’s time for officials to take note of problems
Got time on your hands? Drive toward Highway 67-167 west of Pine Street on Highway 321. Go, say, about 7:15 a.m. Then come east on the same road about 5:15 to 6 p.m. Any weekday.
Wanna see a line of cars backed up more than half-a-mile? That’s the fate that awaits you on that so-called Cabot bypass or back road.
Cabot has more traffic problem areas than many towns two and three times bigger. Why? The town has been in bedroom-community-growth-mode for two decades or more so where is the long-range planning for the guaranteed increased traffic?
Cabot, like many communities, has an "image" problem. A majority of community leaders, from the mayor on down, imagine that problems will go away if you just don’t talk about them.
Many communities in this state and the nation have long-range plans. Cabot’s idea of long-range planning is thinking about doing something next Thursday.
Cabot’s two main entrance and exit thoroughfares to 67-167 – Highway 321 and West Main – are single-lane roads. The roads simply cannot handle the traffic load now; the problem is only going to get worse.
So, again, why?
Small-town thinking.
It’s Cabot’s biggest failing. There are few giraffes out there, people willing to stick their necks out to pinpoint problems and offer ideas to fix them.
This is a go-along-to-get-along community.
That’s why the town elected officials let developers do just about whatever they want to do. That’s why we have sidewalks that dead-end at a ditch and pick up on the other side. That’s why we have subdivisions that have dangerous entrances into main thoroughfares.
That’s why we allow the school district to open up new driveways at schools (Southside Elementary this year) for parents dropping off kids without constructing a turn lane, further complicating the lives of morning commuters.
That’s why the drainage situation in Cabot guarantees flooding when there’s a storm.
Cabot is a great community but think how much better it could be if people – especially elected officials – would just believe that “just because you’re small doesn’t mean you have to think small.”
Wanna see a line of cars backed up more than half-a-mile? That’s the fate that awaits you on that so-called Cabot bypass or back road.
Cabot has more traffic problem areas than many towns two and three times bigger. Why? The town has been in bedroom-community-growth-mode for two decades or more so where is the long-range planning for the guaranteed increased traffic?
Cabot, like many communities, has an "image" problem. A majority of community leaders, from the mayor on down, imagine that problems will go away if you just don’t talk about them.
Many communities in this state and the nation have long-range plans. Cabot’s idea of long-range planning is thinking about doing something next Thursday.
Cabot’s two main entrance and exit thoroughfares to 67-167 – Highway 321 and West Main – are single-lane roads. The roads simply cannot handle the traffic load now; the problem is only going to get worse.
So, again, why?
Small-town thinking.
It’s Cabot’s biggest failing. There are few giraffes out there, people willing to stick their necks out to pinpoint problems and offer ideas to fix them.
This is a go-along-to-get-along community.
That’s why the town elected officials let developers do just about whatever they want to do. That’s why we have sidewalks that dead-end at a ditch and pick up on the other side. That’s why we have subdivisions that have dangerous entrances into main thoroughfares.
That’s why we allow the school district to open up new driveways at schools (Southside Elementary this year) for parents dropping off kids without constructing a turn lane, further complicating the lives of morning commuters.
That’s why the drainage situation in Cabot guarantees flooding when there’s a storm.
Cabot is a great community but think how much better it could be if people – especially elected officials – would just believe that “just because you’re small doesn’t mean you have to think small.”
The column that didn't run
In 2009, a column that was scheduled to run in the Cabot Star Herald was pulled at the last minute due to its political nature. It was the last Footprints column for that paper. From a strictly historical standpoint, the column is reprinted here because it concerns a candidate for State Senate, Cabot Mayor Eddie Joe Williams.
But Eddie Joe,
beer is just
liquid bread!
Cabot Mayor Eddie Joe Williams can’t win for losing.
Williams must enjoy getting the political snagglewads knocked out of him, because he keeps playing his same one-sour-note song: “Alcohol, legal or not, ain’t got no place in Cabot. Can I get an ‘amen?’”
Last week the Cabot city budget and personnel committee met to discuss several items, including a proposed tax on the alcohol sold at two Cabot restaurants. While the three city officials who had a hand in shepherding the controversial ordinance – Alderman Lisa Brickell, City Attorney Jim Taylor and Mayor Williams – were no-shows, the four members of the committee – Eddie Cook, Jon Moore, Rick Prentice and Tom Armstrong – did show up.
And courageously they faced the chin music played by two different bands: The Silent Firs and the Ragin’ Agins.
The Agins (as in “agin” the tax) had the loudest horn section … two emotional trumpet solos with some chattering wind instruments as background. Former Alderman Becky LeMaster and Karen Elrod, owner of Fat Daddy’s Restaurant, decried the ordinance from different perspectives: LeMaster from the standpoint of accusing Taylor of overstepping his bounds in preparing an ordinance before public comment, and Elrod, who tongue-slapped Mayor Williams for being “petty” and “vindictive.”
The Firs, for the most part, didn’t have much to say.
This issue is not about taxing alcohol served in restaurants; it’s not about family values, community morals or what’s right or wrong. It’s about fair play, equal treatment and common sense.
Until these two law-abiding and rule-following eating establishments received a wine and beer permit from the state Alcohol Beverage Control Commission, there was no issue.
Despite the fact that Lonoke County had four such alcohol-supply stations in the county prior to Kopan’s receiving its license, it was not an issue. It was not an issue when Mayor Eddie Joe Williams joined one of those private clubs.
It was only after Mayor Eddie Joe Williams went before the ABC twice to protest the lawful granting of private club status to these two good restaurants and was handed his ego in a basket both times did this become an issue.
The ordinance (which is so full of legal holes as to be laughable) was aimed at making it, at the very least, exasperating for good businesses owned by good citizens and good taxpayers to continue to do business in Cabot.
Don’t expect Mayor Williams to take this defeat – he’s 0 for 3 in the fight – in good spirits. Count on the issue will be brought up again by a fellow evangelistic aldermen … and the fight starts anew.
One thing is certain: Mayor Williams doesn’t know when to quit, doesn’t care that he is giving the city a black eye in regard to city/business relationships and will keep creating avoidable brouhahas until he no longer has the platform from which to perform.
The owners of Kopan’s and Fat Daddy’s deserve an apology from the city leaders.
Don’t expect that to happen. Petty politics can be counted on to keep good people from taking an unpopular stance.
But Eddie Joe,
beer is just
liquid bread!
Cabot Mayor Eddie Joe Williams can’t win for losing.
Williams must enjoy getting the political snagglewads knocked out of him, because he keeps playing his same one-sour-note song: “Alcohol, legal or not, ain’t got no place in Cabot. Can I get an ‘amen?’”
Last week the Cabot city budget and personnel committee met to discuss several items, including a proposed tax on the alcohol sold at two Cabot restaurants. While the three city officials who had a hand in shepherding the controversial ordinance – Alderman Lisa Brickell, City Attorney Jim Taylor and Mayor Williams – were no-shows, the four members of the committee – Eddie Cook, Jon Moore, Rick Prentice and Tom Armstrong – did show up.
And courageously they faced the chin music played by two different bands: The Silent Firs and the Ragin’ Agins.
The Agins (as in “agin” the tax) had the loudest horn section … two emotional trumpet solos with some chattering wind instruments as background. Former Alderman Becky LeMaster and Karen Elrod, owner of Fat Daddy’s Restaurant, decried the ordinance from different perspectives: LeMaster from the standpoint of accusing Taylor of overstepping his bounds in preparing an ordinance before public comment, and Elrod, who tongue-slapped Mayor Williams for being “petty” and “vindictive.”
The Firs, for the most part, didn’t have much to say.
This issue is not about taxing alcohol served in restaurants; it’s not about family values, community morals or what’s right or wrong. It’s about fair play, equal treatment and common sense.
Until these two law-abiding and rule-following eating establishments received a wine and beer permit from the state Alcohol Beverage Control Commission, there was no issue.
Despite the fact that Lonoke County had four such alcohol-supply stations in the county prior to Kopan’s receiving its license, it was not an issue. It was not an issue when Mayor Eddie Joe Williams joined one of those private clubs.
It was only after Mayor Eddie Joe Williams went before the ABC twice to protest the lawful granting of private club status to these two good restaurants and was handed his ego in a basket both times did this become an issue.
The ordinance (which is so full of legal holes as to be laughable) was aimed at making it, at the very least, exasperating for good businesses owned by good citizens and good taxpayers to continue to do business in Cabot.
Don’t expect Mayor Williams to take this defeat – he’s 0 for 3 in the fight – in good spirits. Count on the issue will be brought up again by a fellow evangelistic aldermen … and the fight starts anew.
One thing is certain: Mayor Williams doesn’t know when to quit, doesn’t care that he is giving the city a black eye in regard to city/business relationships and will keep creating avoidable brouhahas until he no longer has the platform from which to perform.
The owners of Kopan’s and Fat Daddy’s deserve an apology from the city leaders.
Don’t expect that to happen. Petty politics can be counted on to keep good people from taking an unpopular stance.
Name is the thing in local political arena
Signs promoting political candidates are as prolific as dandelions after a spring shower.
Experienced politicians and their counterpart wouldbes spend money and time putting names, faces, cutesy phrases and other visual litter on billboards, flyers, brochures and yard signs.
Drive along any roadway in Central Arkansas and you are greeted by smiling faces and DOTcom addresses and phrases so full of political sugar as to gag any thinking voter.
In Lonoke County we have a candidate who has uses a picture of himself wearing a cowboy hat … a black cowboy hat! If you have to wear a hat in a campaign photo, always wear white hat for political pictures. (Note: See Lonoke Sheriff Jim Roberson’s campaign literature. He is wearing a white hat, although it looks a 12-gallon hat on a seven-gallon head.)
And, then there are the nicknames.
For some reason, more than a handful of local politicians think nicknames will aid in the voter recognition category.
In my previous life as a newspaper reporter, editor and publisher, I ran news stories about politicians with the following acknowledged and embraced nicknames: Babe. Babs. Bubba. Chubby. Goody. Gunslinger. Judge. Junior. Justice. Possom. Skeeter. Slick. Slim. Stick. Win. Wizard.
On the local level, some politicians like to come up with phrases they intend to stick in the voters’ minds come voting time. GoEddieJoe is the slogan of Cabot Mayor Eddie Joe Williams, who is trying to better himself on the political front by running for state senate.
NoEddieJoe is the counter-phrase being bandied about by some; other options heard are SlowEddieJoe and NoShowEddieJoe or NoMoEddieJoe.
The local nickname getting the most play in the Cabot area in the past several years has been Stubby, as in Stubby Stumbaugh. This political battler doesn’t shy away from his childhood nickname, embracing it without so much as alluding to his real name, Mickey D.
Survey after survey have shown that some nicknames are catchy enough to positively resonate with voters.
So, when you see a nickname or other campaign gimmick that makes you grimace, remember: It’s your fault.
If every voter declared a personal moratorium on voting for any candidate who elected to use a clumsy moniker or sweet-cute phrase to aid their campaign, the nickname silliness would end.
Experienced politicians and their counterpart wouldbes spend money and time putting names, faces, cutesy phrases and other visual litter on billboards, flyers, brochures and yard signs.
Drive along any roadway in Central Arkansas and you are greeted by smiling faces and DOTcom addresses and phrases so full of political sugar as to gag any thinking voter.
In Lonoke County we have a candidate who has uses a picture of himself wearing a cowboy hat … a black cowboy hat! If you have to wear a hat in a campaign photo, always wear white hat for political pictures. (Note: See Lonoke Sheriff Jim Roberson’s campaign literature. He is wearing a white hat, although it looks a 12-gallon hat on a seven-gallon head.)
And, then there are the nicknames.
For some reason, more than a handful of local politicians think nicknames will aid in the voter recognition category.
In my previous life as a newspaper reporter, editor and publisher, I ran news stories about politicians with the following acknowledged and embraced nicknames: Babe. Babs. Bubba. Chubby. Goody. Gunslinger. Judge. Junior. Justice. Possom. Skeeter. Slick. Slim. Stick. Win. Wizard.
On the local level, some politicians like to come up with phrases they intend to stick in the voters’ minds come voting time. GoEddieJoe is the slogan of Cabot Mayor Eddie Joe Williams, who is trying to better himself on the political front by running for state senate.
NoEddieJoe is the counter-phrase being bandied about by some; other options heard are SlowEddieJoe and NoShowEddieJoe or NoMoEddieJoe.
The local nickname getting the most play in the Cabot area in the past several years has been Stubby, as in Stubby Stumbaugh. This political battler doesn’t shy away from his childhood nickname, embracing it without so much as alluding to his real name, Mickey D.
Survey after survey have shown that some nicknames are catchy enough to positively resonate with voters.
So, when you see a nickname or other campaign gimmick that makes you grimace, remember: It’s your fault.
If every voter declared a personal moratorium on voting for any candidate who elected to use a clumsy moniker or sweet-cute phrase to aid their campaign, the nickname silliness would end.
Small-town thinking certainly not confined to small towns
It is a fact of STA (small-town American) that a few people run most local government or public entities – school districts, communities, counties. It is a truism with few exceptions.
Lonoke County and some of the towns that are included in it are perfect examples of how the intellectual gene pools have been drained to the point of single digit IQs making major decisions.
For years Lonoke County has been wrestling with trying to mesh the need for a new jail with incoming revenues. Finally, a couple of years ago, the county Quorum Court buckled down and approved the construction of a new jail.
That jail is scheduled to open in February 2011. Maybe.
The “maybe” comes as a result of small-brain / small-town thinking.
The county is building the jail, but apparently the cost of operating it – an estimated $1.3 million a year – was never fully considered nor explored.
The citizens of Lonoke County have elected officials – County Judge Charlie Troutman, Sheriff Jim Roberson, and Justices of the peace Mike Dolan, Mark Edwards, H.L. Lang, Tim Lemons, Roger Lynch, Alexis Malham, Jeannette Minton, Larry Odom, Bill Ryker, Adam Sims, Jodie Troutman, Barry Weathers and Sony Moery – that are supposed to be looking out after the interests of the citizens.
In this case, somebody – everybody! – apparently went to sleep.
It is the county judge’s primary responsibility to be the planner, organizer, coordinator and budget overseer for the county. The judge, running for re-election, apparently didn’t do his homework and advise the JPs on what would be needed. Neither did Roberson and neither did anyone else.
Where to come up with the money?
The county budget committee will have to solve that thorny problem. But it would behoove the county judge and the county sheriff and all the JPs to start thinking … and quit assuming.
A (quote) state-of-the-at jail (end quote) with insufficient money to operate it.
What a maroon of a situation!
Lonoke County and some of the towns that are included in it are perfect examples of how the intellectual gene pools have been drained to the point of single digit IQs making major decisions.
For years Lonoke County has been wrestling with trying to mesh the need for a new jail with incoming revenues. Finally, a couple of years ago, the county Quorum Court buckled down and approved the construction of a new jail.
That jail is scheduled to open in February 2011. Maybe.
The “maybe” comes as a result of small-brain / small-town thinking.
The county is building the jail, but apparently the cost of operating it – an estimated $1.3 million a year – was never fully considered nor explored.
The citizens of Lonoke County have elected officials – County Judge Charlie Troutman, Sheriff Jim Roberson, and Justices of the peace Mike Dolan, Mark Edwards, H.L. Lang, Tim Lemons, Roger Lynch, Alexis Malham, Jeannette Minton, Larry Odom, Bill Ryker, Adam Sims, Jodie Troutman, Barry Weathers and Sony Moery – that are supposed to be looking out after the interests of the citizens.
In this case, somebody – everybody! – apparently went to sleep.
It is the county judge’s primary responsibility to be the planner, organizer, coordinator and budget overseer for the county. The judge, running for re-election, apparently didn’t do his homework and advise the JPs on what would be needed. Neither did Roberson and neither did anyone else.
Where to come up with the money?
The county budget committee will have to solve that thorny problem. But it would behoove the county judge and the county sheriff and all the JPs to start thinking … and quit assuming.
A (quote) state-of-the-at jail (end quote) with insufficient money to operate it.
What a maroon of a situation!
Sunday, March 22, 2009
Money, money everywhere . . .
It's time for
the piper to
pay all of us
There is more so-called free money floating around due to the U.S. Stimulus Package than Carter has Little Liver Pills.
Arkansas is getting a nice chunk and the project list reads not so much like a "Oh!" list but like a "What the heck is this?" list.
Did you know the state is going to receive a $3.636 million for hybrid striped bass research? And, a grant for $3.45 million is going to the Dale Bumpers Rice Research Center. That's on top of the $3.45 million ponied up for the Dale Bumpers Small Farms Research Center. And, don't forget that more than $10.5 million has been allocated for research on fish, rice and small farms.
What else is Arkansas getting to drive the economy?
There's another $994,000 for studying endophytes; the UofA in Fayetteville is receiving $580,000 for its agriculture law program; $1.95 million for conservation efforts (could just as well be "liberal" efforts) by the National Water Management System in Little Rock; and $519,000 for catfish and baitfish research.
(For the record, an endophyte is a plant growing inside another plant. I looked it up. We must assume that because someone applied for the grant and the federal government approved the money, it is important to reviving the economy.)
Anybody seeing the pattern here?
Ever been to Dierks Lake down in Southwest Arkansas? That little lake is getting a facelift to the tune of $1.26 million. The Osceola Harbor (Osceola has a harbor?) is on the tab for $1.1 million.
The Delta Regional Authority is getting a whole bunch of money from several grants and it's not worth the time to total them up.
Something identified as "food damage reduction" is up for $1.1 million; $950,000 for landscaping of Fort Smith's Garrison Avenue; $330,000 for extending water and sewer lines in Warren, and; $237,000 to design and engineer a trolley car extension in Fort Smith.
Shoot! And here I thought there'd probably be some trivial projects hidden in the monetary laundry list.
With Cabot's ultra-high level need for traffic congestion eradication, surely there's something in the plan for an overpass, street widening, road extensions ... something. Anything.
Let's see: Nope, not there. No, not in that column. Where can it be?
There's gimme-money transportation projects all over the place, but not one mention of Cabot. Money has been allocated for road projects in Little Rock, Arkansas City, Washington and Benton counties, Fort Smith, Vilonia, Bella Vista ... and a railroad overpass in Marion.
No Cabot. No surprise there.
My personal favorite gimme grant is for $100,000 for "community-oriented crime-prevention efforts by the Cotton Plant Police Department."
For the record, Cotton Plant is where Andy and Barney lived before they moved to Mayberry.
the piper to
pay all of us
There is more so-called free money floating around due to the U.S. Stimulus Package than Carter has Little Liver Pills.
Arkansas is getting a nice chunk and the project list reads not so much like a "Oh!" list but like a "What the heck is this?" list.
Did you know the state is going to receive a $3.636 million for hybrid striped bass research? And, a grant for $3.45 million is going to the Dale Bumpers Rice Research Center. That's on top of the $3.45 million ponied up for the Dale Bumpers Small Farms Research Center. And, don't forget that more than $10.5 million has been allocated for research on fish, rice and small farms.
What else is Arkansas getting to drive the economy?
There's another $994,000 for studying endophytes; the UofA in Fayetteville is receiving $580,000 for its agriculture law program; $1.95 million for conservation efforts (could just as well be "liberal" efforts) by the National Water Management System in Little Rock; and $519,000 for catfish and baitfish research.
(For the record, an endophyte is a plant growing inside another plant. I looked it up. We must assume that because someone applied for the grant and the federal government approved the money, it is important to reviving the economy.)
Anybody seeing the pattern here?
Ever been to Dierks Lake down in Southwest Arkansas? That little lake is getting a facelift to the tune of $1.26 million. The Osceola Harbor (Osceola has a harbor?) is on the tab for $1.1 million.
The Delta Regional Authority is getting a whole bunch of money from several grants and it's not worth the time to total them up.
Something identified as "food damage reduction" is up for $1.1 million; $950,000 for landscaping of Fort Smith's Garrison Avenue; $330,000 for extending water and sewer lines in Warren, and; $237,000 to design and engineer a trolley car extension in Fort Smith.
Shoot! And here I thought there'd probably be some trivial projects hidden in the monetary laundry list.
With Cabot's ultra-high level need for traffic congestion eradication, surely there's something in the plan for an overpass, street widening, road extensions ... something. Anything.
Let's see: Nope, not there. No, not in that column. Where can it be?
There's gimme-money transportation projects all over the place, but not one mention of Cabot. Money has been allocated for road projects in Little Rock, Arkansas City, Washington and Benton counties, Fort Smith, Vilonia, Bella Vista ... and a railroad overpass in Marion.
No Cabot. No surprise there.
My personal favorite gimme grant is for $100,000 for "community-oriented crime-prevention efforts by the Cotton Plant Police Department."
For the record, Cotton Plant is where Andy and Barney lived before they moved to Mayberry.
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